I just read an entry in Oswald Chamber's classic and amazingly profound devotional My Utmost for His Highest, and I believe it speaks volumes to many of the problems we have as Christians today.
"And the Lord turned the captivity of Job when he prayed for his friends." Job 42:10After reading this four or five times to let the message really sink in, as I always seem to have to do with Chambers, I realized how much I desperately need such wisdom in my own life as a follower of Christ. How many times do we become so preoccupied with trying to become "better Christians," begging and pleading for God to accelerate His work of sanctifying us and bringing us to perfection? How often do we go back to square one, thinking that we must ask Him to justify and forgive us once again, as if the Cross meant nothing? We continue with this attitude of self-centredness, thinking ourselves pious because we want to improve ourselves, when what we are really doing is, as Chambers puts it, "rebelling against the Atonement." It may seem innocent, but we are actually rejecting the sacrifice of Christ and striving to be "more justified" in the eyes of God. What is most ironic of all is that when I am most honest with myself, the most fulfilling and remarkable times of spiritual growth in my life are always when I drop the self-focus and live out an outward-focused Christianity, keeping the above-mentioned intercessory prayer and love for others at the forefront of my thoughts. When I do this, that is, live as an ambassador of Christ shining light into the world rather than trying to light my own candle all the time, then sanctification just seems to flow naturally. This should come as no surprise, since it is how Christ intended for us to live.
The plaintive, self-centred, morbid kind of prayer, a dead-set that I want to be right, is never found in the New Testament. The fact that I am trying to be right with God is a sign that I am rebelling against the Atonement. "Lord, I will purify my heart if You will answer my prayer; I will walk rightly if You will help me." I cannot make myself right with God, I cannot make my life perfect; I can only be right with God if I accept the Atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ as an absolute gift. Am I humble enough to accept it? I have to resign every kind of claim and cease from every effort, and leave myself entirely alone in His hands, and then begin to pour out in the priestly work of intercession. There is much prayer that arises from real disbelief in the Atonement. Jesus is not beginning to save us, He has saved us, the thing is done, and it is an insult to ask Him to do it.
If you are not getting the hundredfold more, not getting insight into God's word, then start praying for your friends, enter into the ministry of the interior. "The Lord turned the captivity of Job when he prayed for his friends." The real business of your life as a saved soul is intercessory prayer. Wherever God puts you in circumstances, pray immediately, pray that His Atonement may be realized in other lives as it has been in yours. Pray for your friends now; pray for those with whom you come in contact now.
Unfortunately, being in Europe has made it very difficult for me to live this way. This is no excuse, and I must always take full responsibility for my action as well as my inaction, but it does provide a clear image to me of where I need to grow. It is much easier to focus on living a Christian walk of service and compassion for others when I am in my comfort zone, surrounded by those I already know and love very deeply. Making new connections and shining any form of light here has been a challenge to say the least, and I have spent far too much time focusing on myself: trying to be better, praying for God to make me better, or beating myself up for not being better. For those who are struggling with this kind of outlook, I encourage you to read the devotional entry above as many times as it takes to let the message sink in. He has already paid the price for you, now be the new creation that you are and begin to pray for and minister to those around you. Only then will you move from glory to glory, being transformed more and more into the image of Christ.
(One last note that I found very interesting, the verse in 2 Corinthians 3 that speaks about moving from glory to glory is actually spoken of in the context of a covenant that shines glory through us to others around us. We have had a veil removed from our hearts to allow us to not only see the glory of God, but to shine this glory to others and lead them to Him. What an amazing privilege, and even more encouragement to pray for and focus on others around us!)
